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Mark turned her around and lifted her head with his finger. "I'm going to say something and I hope I don't upset you and I don't want you to take it the wrong way. That's the last time I want you to tell that story...it's part of the past and it's time to keep it in the past. I know you will mourn your mother, Cassandra, and your friends for the rest of your life, but the others...the others aren't worth the pain it causes you when you talk about what has happened to you. They didn't deserve your friendship or your love, and you've moved on in spite of them. So don't give them the satisfaction of even mentioning them. You now have people in your life who return as much love as you give them. Michael, your parents, me, and even Sam are never going to treat you like those people did. I know how dangerous it is to say the word 'never', but I wouldn't hesitate in using it in this situation. As far as Jason goes, it doesn't even matter to me what he did, but I know I'll never walk away from you...never. I will always be here for you no matter what may come up along the way, and there are bound to be some things because no relationship is perfect, but I waited too long to find a woman like you to give up without a fight. So let's focus on each other and leave everybody else who has ever done us wrong behind, okay?"
"Okay...I guess I've held on to the past for too long now and it's time to let it go." Rain answered, giving Mark a weak smile. Looking at the clock, she saw she had been talking for close to two hours. "Are you staying?" Mark nodded his head. "Seeing as how it's one in the morning, I think I'll just stay here with you tomorrow and take a sick day. They won't miss me for one day." "All right, then let's go to bed." Rain placed her arm around Mark's waist, and after turning out the lights, Mark and Rain walked towards the bedroom.
"Mark, I'm not going to drop this until you give me a straight answer." "I already gave you a straight answer, Rain. I can't think of anything I want or any place I want to go for my birthday." Mark replied. "So don't worry about it. This birthday will come and go like the rest of them." "People like you give people like me ulcers every day." Rain said, becoming frustrated.
A little over a year had passed since Rain had shared everything...well, just about everything about her past with Mark and their relationship was very strong. Stronger than any relationship either Rain or Mark had had before, a relationship full of trust and love. She and Mark were on her back porch enjoying a late summer evening dinner and watching Sasha and Ginger play with each other in the yard.
"You're the kind of person who says 'Oh, it doesn't matter what you get me, it's the thought that counts', or 'I already have everything I want'. I don't believe that for a minute. There has to be SOMETHING you want, you just need to think harder because you're not getting off easy on this one."
"But I do have everything I want because I have you." Mark said with a smile and a wink.
Rain groaned and acted like she was getting ready to be sick. "I can't believe you sank down to that level and just said that. That line may work on other women and have them feeling weak in the knees, but it's not gonna work on me, mister."
"I knew it wouldn't, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity to say it and see your reaction." Mark sat his fork down and took a sip of his drink. "Why is it so important to you anyways? So you make such a big deal with everybody else's birthdays?"
"Actually yes I do. The difference is they tell me what they want and don't act stubborn like you do." Rain answered back. "I just want to do something for you because of how special you made my last birthday for me. So could you give me a little help here?"
"Okay, I want to do something that involves only the two of us."
"Well I could have guessed that much on my own." Rain said, shaking her head. "But at least it's a step in the right direction. Now what do you WANT us to do together?"
"I could think of one thing I would like us to do together."
"Get your dirty little mind out of the gutter, Mark." Rain said, gathering up the dishes and heading towards the litchen. "Men, they can only think of one thing all the time." she muttered to herself, ignoring Mark's chuckling.
As Rain washed the dishes, Mark grabbed a frisbee and joined the dogs for a game of catch, thinking about what he had just said. While everything else in their relationship had taken off, that part had basically stayed still. Anything more intimate than a kiss made Rain uncomfortable...he could always tell because she would immediately stiffen up or break a kiss and look away from him. Mark wasn't the kind of guy to force the issue, knowing that her self esteem regarding her appearance was causing Rain to throw up walls, and he wasn't about to get angry or leave her over it, but he was a guy...and he wanted to be with her in that way.
In his dreams, they would always be in a room lit solely with candles, making love to each other, saying how much they loved each other, and the way she looked as the candle light fell upon her face and how she held him always sent him reeling. There were a few times when Mark almost asked Rain if she would ever be able to trust him to love her body as it was or allow him to love her body, but he wasn't about to throw away two and a half years with Rain over this. Mark didn't know why he sometimes worried about whether or not they would explore that part of their love, he knew their relationship would be just as strong if they only kissed instead of making love. He figured it was because that's how most people measured their relationships. It's been pounded into so many people's minds over the years that no relationship is complete unless you give both your love AND body to the other person.
"You know, the object of playing frisbee with a dog is to actually throw the frisbee instead of just standing there with it. Otherwise you've missed the whole point." Mark slowly turned his head to see Rain standing beside him, arms folded across her chest and an amused expression on her face. "And it's also not fair to the dog either." Rain said as she motioned towards the dogs.
Mark looked down and saw Sasha and Ginger gazing up at him as if to say 'Could you PLEASE throw the frisbee NOW??? We're tired of sitting here waiting for you'. Mark shrugged his shoulders, laughed, and threw the frisbee. "Sorta got side tracked."
"So what were you thinking of anyways. You looked like you were very deep in thought."
"Nothing for you to worry about." Mark answered. "But I now know what I want us to do for my birthday."
"Oh really, and what would that be?" Rain asked as she took the frisbee Sasha had returned and threw it again.
"A friend told me about this place in Louiseville that offers hot air balloon rides. I know my birthday falls in the middle of the week, but we could celebrate that weekend, maybe leave on Friday, get a hotel room or a cabin, and ride in one of the balloons that Saturday or Sunday." Mark answered. "I've never been in a hot air balloon, but it sounds like something I'd want to do. Have you ever been in one before?"
"No, I can stand flying around in an airplane but there's something about actually being out there that's kinda unnerving. I could only guess how majestic and awe-inspiring the view is from up there in one of those balloons." Rain gave him a surprised look. "You're always full of surprises, huh? I never would have thought you'd come up with an idea like this one."
"You should never underestimate me or the crazy things my mind can think up."
"Yeah, I should know that by now." Rain said, rolling her eyes. "So this is what you want to do for your birthday."
"Yep."
"Anything else you want? I mean material wise like something for your bike, jewelry, clothing...anything like that?"
"Not that I can think of, but I'm sure you're gonna get me something anyways, so just surprise me."
"Do you know the name of this place?" Rain asked as she, Mark, and the dogs walked into the house.
Mark sat down on one of the bar stools and watched as Rain fixed a sundae for the both of them. "I think the name is Crawford, Crawford Hot Air Balloon Rides. You probably need to call them soon because I remember him telling me you have to make reservations two weeks in advance."
"Then I'll take care of everything tomorrow on my lunch break." Rain remarked as she placed the sundae on the counter between them and handed him a spoon. She took a spoonful of the dessert and placed it in her mouth. "Have you talked to your sister lately?"
"I spoke to her two weeks ago. She and Chad are hard and heavy into planning their wedding. Why do you ask?"
"Well you know your sister and I have become really good friends over the past year, talking on the phone and over the computer...especially over the computer because our phone bills have been bad here lately."
"Yeah, and?" Mark asked as he ate a part of the sundae, wondering where Rain was going with this.
"Last night we were having one of our normal conversations, talking about work and what have you, and we veered to the subject of her wedding. The usual stuff came up like have you found a dress yet, thought of colors for the wedding or the bridesmaid's dresses, thought about a place to go for your honeymoon." Rain answered as she looked at the sundae. "She wants me to be in her wedding. I was too shocked to give her an answer and I'm not sure if I'm gonna do it."
"Why wouldn't you want to be in her wedding? You'll be there anyways."
"I don't know...standing in the front of a room full of people I don't know is one big reason." Rain answered. "Don't get me wrong, I feel very honored that she asked and even thought of me, but...oh, forget it. I'm just being foolish. You're probably tired of me always telling you my problems and complaints."
"You're not being foolish and I'm not tired of hearing you talk about your problems or what's bothering you. That's what I'm here for." Mark replied. "Never worry yourself about that."
"No, I think for once I won't burden you with this and just figure it out on my own." Rain said as she shook her head. "I know I'll probably just swallow my fears and pride and do it. Besides, it will probably be the only wedding I'm ever a part of."
"Why do you say that?"
"Just never saw myself getting married."
"Because you don't want to or because you never thought anybody would ask?"
"Truth is I KNEW no body would ask. It wasn't like guys were knocking down my door and fighting to the death to sweep me off my feet."
"What if I asked you to marry me?" Mark asked. "Would you say yes?"
The spoonful of ice cream Rain was about to eat froze in mid-air. She looked at Mark like he had fallen off the deep end. "What do you mean 'if I asked you to marry me'?"
"Just wondering if you would even think of saying yes."
"Is this hypothetical or are you actually asking me?"
"Little bit of both." Mark answered with a smile.
"Well, I...uhm, I'd say, I mean I would, uh..." Rain stuttered, stumbled, and whatever other word you could use to describe her attempt at avoiding a straight answer, even though she already knew the answer to that question. "I think I'm, I'm gonna plead the fifth on that one." Rain, figuring she should stop before she started to sound too much like Porky Pig, shoved the spoonful of ice cream in her mouth and looked away.
"You should see how red your face is right now." Mark snickered. "I was curious, that's all. It's not like I'm demanding an answer from you this very minute."
"You shouldn't do that to a woman, talking about someone else's marriage and then start talking about getting married yourself. The m-word is bound to make any woman act a little flustered and stammer her words." Rain lectured as she scooped up the last of the ice cream and held it to Mark's mouth which he took. Rain cleaned up the remaining dishes and sat down beside Mark. "You up for a walk before we call it a night?" He asked as she leaned against him.
"Depends, as long as you don't drop anymore bomb shells on me like asking if I would consider having your baby." Rain joked.
"Cute, very cute. Now come on."
"Well I basically have everything settled for this weekend for Mark's birthday. They only offer rides the first few hours of sunrise and the last hours before sunset, so I reserved the balloon ride before sunset so we wouldn't have to worry about rushing up there and getting up at the crack of dawn. I also reserved a room for us at a bed and breakfast for the weekend that was nearby. Now, the only thing I lack is an actual present for him. You wouldn't happen to have any bright ideas you could throw my way, would you, Micheal?" Rain asked.
Micheal and her were in his office sharing Chinese take out for lunch. "I'm sure you could probably just skip the present because this weekend is all the present he needs." Micheal answered. "Geez, I wish I had a girlfriend who went throught this much trouble for my birthday."
"Oh you'll find someone soon enough. She's out there, you're just not looking hard enough." Rain said as she took a bit of her sweet and sour chicken. "Now back to the crisis at hand. I know I don't have to get him a present, but I want to and I only have three days to come up with a good one. So come on and help me here!"
"Alright, alright, alright...just give me a minute to think about it." Micheal relented as he sat back in his chair, and a few minutes later he still had nothing to offer. "I honestly can't think of anything off hand that he would want. This is the guy who, when he lived in Texas, only received a birthday card from me because he didn't want me to get him anything else. He, on the other hand, normally spared no expense when it came to my birthday. Mark is just one of those kinds of people who would rather spend money on others than to have it spent on himself. Might as well get used to it or you'll just end up completely frustrated."
"Thanks for nothing." Rain huffed.
"Be creative then if you can't think of anything else to get him. Maybe give him a coupon for a free massage or a night or weekend to do what he wants." Micheal offered. "Have you thought about jewelry?"
"Oh please! That coupon thing has been tried and tried again, besides, I give him massages all the time so that wouldn't be anything new. As far as the jewelry idea goes, Mark wears a watch and a gold chain, so I don't think he's into jewelry that much."
"Hey, you asked for a suggestion and I gave you one!" Micheal defensively said.
Rain let out a loud sigh. "Sorry for being b*tchy. I just want to do something nice for him."
"You've planned a wonderful weekend for him and he'll be more than happy with that. I know I would be, so save your worrying for his Christmas present."
"Oh great. I get to do this again at Christmas? Remind me to buy some Mylanta before the hoidays come. If this is any indication, I'm really gonna need it."
"You always worried too much over giving gifts."
"You can thank my mother for that particular character trait."
"By the way, do you know if Mark is going to be gracing me with his presence tonight or is he spending another night with you?" Micheal asked. "I barely see the guy anymore...hard to remember what he looks like. I think I remember him being tall and red-headed."
"You're being silly. He's not over there that much."
"Not over there that much? Mark's at your house at least five nights a week if not more. I'm beginning to feel like the other woman here...he only stops by one or two nights a week before he runs back to you." Micheal stopped and pretended to wipe away imaginary tears. "Alas, I think the day I dreaded has finally come, he loves you more now than he loves me." Letting out a sigh, Micheal raised his hand to his forehead in a dramatic fashion. "What ever am I going to do now?"
Rain could offer no response to the piece of theater that was being performed in the front of her because of how much she was laughing...laughter that was shaking her body and bringing tears to her eyes. And when Micheal put a childish pout on his face, Rain felt like she was going to pass out because she had trouble getting air in between the peals of laughter. "W-would you, pl-please STOP?! I can't take anymore!"
"Why should I stop? You deserve this because you stole MY man away from me, you little homewrecker!" Micheal spat at her. That was all Rain could take. She started laughing harder and coughing because of it, and then Rain fell out of her seat which caused Micheal to join in. "Alright, I think I'll stop before we both end up dying from laughing." Micheal said after a few minutes.
"Th-thank you!" Rain said out of breath. She took that moment to clean up the empty boxes and catch her breath. After grabbing her drink, Rain sat back down in her chair next to Micheal. "I think you're the only person in the world who can get me to laugh like that."
"Years of practice to work off of." Micheal said with a grin. "But I do have something to ask you. I was only jerking your chain before, bugging you about Mark always being at your house, but the truth is he IS there a lot. So why don't you two move in together? He's basically living there anyways."
"Subject's never came up. Didn't know if it was something he wanted." Rain answered as she looked out the window into the shop area. "It's a big step even though we are basically living together. I was thinking of asking him but I didn't know if it was the right thing to do. Maybe the whole reason things are so good right now is because we do take a break from each other at least one night a week. I'm worried that we'll get sick of each other if we're around each other that much."
"Something tells me you don't have to worry about that. It's not like you would be around each other 24 hours a day. Both of you will be at work during the day and then you'll see each other at night. Sometimes he'll stay at work late or hang out with friends and sometimes you'll be over here with me...at least then I'd know you were coming to see me and I wasn't just some consolation prize for seeing Mark." Micheal said as he dodged Rain's punch.
"There are plenty of times when I just talk to you or come over to only visit you, so don't even try to lay a guilt trip on me."
"You really do care...I'm sooooo touched." Micheal teased. This time he wasn't able to avoid Rain's punch and he let out a 'umph' when she landed it. "You didn't have to hit me so hard!"
"Stop teasing me then!"
"Oh alright!" Micheal sighed. "You're not as much fun as you used to be. Mark's made ya soft."
"Soft, huh?" Rain challenged as she proceeded to puch him again. "I don't think so."
"Well maybe not too soft." Micheal remarked as he tickled her in response. "As for Mark, I'll share my vast knowledge with you and give you my humble, though correct, opinion. Talk to him about moving in with you. I know he wants the same thing but he's afraid to ask because he doesn't want to rush you into anything that would make you uncomfortable, he's always more worried about your feelings than his wants or needs. As for if this is going to harm your relationship in anyway, I say it won't because you would have seen some thing to hint of that by now after how much time you've spent together. I mean you've seen him first thing in the morning and so has he...and if you can stand that much without wanting to run in the opposite direction screaming your head off, then you're gonna be fine. I won't miss that snoring of his though. At least if you took him I'd be able to get a good night's sleep."
"You should be one to talk. Your snoring is just as bad as his and the way you look in the morning would scare the dead."
"I'm not that bad, am I?" Micheal asked in a hurt voice.
"Sorry, babe, but the answer is yes." Rain answered. "But I love you anyways and thanks for the advice."
"You're welcomed, but the last comment's gonna cost you because I thought of something you could get Mark."
"What if I told you how wonderful a person you are?"
Micheal thought for a minute. "Nah...ain't gonna work. I already know I'm a wonderful person."
"How about you're the best friend a person could have?"
"Ehhh, you're getting warmer."
"Okay, you don't snore as bad as Mark does."
"That'll do." Micheal said triumphantly. "Mark has told me on several occasions that he really wants to have a picture of the two of you together."
Rain sank down in her chair. "He would want the one thing I hate doing more than anything else. I hate having my picture taken."
"I know you do but it's an option in case you can't come up with anything else."
"Probably wouldn't kill me to have a few pictures taken with him and it's such a small request anyways. I could have a few taken by the balloon." Rain glanced at Micheal and gave him a hug. "As always, you came through for me again. Don't know what I'd do without you."
"You'd be lost and wondering what was missing in your life." Micheal joked.
"Don't get too carried away." Rain smiled and kissed him on the forehead. "Better get back to work."
"Oh I see, once you get what you want out of me, you just toss me away like yesterday's trash." "Basically, yeah. What else are you useful for?"
"See if I help you again."
"Oh, you know you always will." Rain waved at him and headed back to her workstation. Micheal could only shake his head and laugh as she walked out of the office.
~Take exit 187, go through two lights, turn left, go approximately 5 miles, bed and breakfast on right~.
Rain read over her written directions and tried to commit them to memory. Their exit was the next one according to the signs along the road and it couldn't have come soon enough. After stealing a quick glance at Mark in the passenger's seat, Rain turned off the overhead light and focused her attention back on the road. Mark had tried to concine her that he could drive but Rain took one look into his sleep deprived eyes and ordered him into the passenger's seat to sleep on the way up to Louiseville. He had worked overtime all week long, to make sure everything was taken care of for his extended week-end off, so the man left in charge of the shop had nothing to worry about. And Mark wouldn't be bombarded with paper work when he returned.
Rain barely saw him most of the week because she was always in bed by the time Mark lumbered into the house, so they were both, needless to say, looking forward to this weekend where they could relax and just be with each other with no worries. Turning onto the road where the bed and breakfast was located, Rain couldn't suppress the smile that was tugging at the corners of her mouth. Mark had no idea that she had reserved a room at a bed and breakfast instead of a room at a hotel...he had just assumed they were staying at a hotel, and that wasn't only one surprise she had in store for him. Rain also planned on asking Mark to move in with her permenantly that Sunday before they returned home. She sorta knew he would say yes but she was still nervous about asking him. A small part of her, that part which still voiced all of her insecurities, was expecting him to say no. That part reminded her that when things were going her way, something negative always happened that set her back...and it usually set her back emotionally.
Rain mentally shook herself, trying to prevent those familar doubts from taking a hold of her again. If she had her way, that person she used to be, who was so insecure and so distrustful, would never show her face again and no part of that woman would remain in the person she was today. Once she parked the car, Rain grabbed her keys and wallet and slowly got out of the car, quietly closing the door behind her and making sure she hadn't awaken Mark. His only response was to adjust his position to a more comfortable one in his sleep. After checking in and obtaining their room key, Rain made her way back to her Cherokee, walking to Mark's side of the truck instead of hers. She unlocked the door and held it open for a minute, looking at Mark as he slept and very reluctant to wake him because he looked so peaceful. Rain brushed her lips over his and then placed a light kiss on Mark's forehead. He stirred slight but settled back into his slumber without opening his eyes.
~And he tried to tell me he wasn't tired~. This time Rain kissed Mark's lips and lowered her mouth to his ear. "Mark, honey, wake up." Once again, Mark stirred but didn't completely wake up. Brushing away some strands of hair that had fallen into his face, Rain gently nudged his shoulder, finally getting him to open his eyes. "We're here sleepyhead." she said with a small smile.
Mark looked around with a curious expression on his face, one, from being half asleep and two, from seeing the house in front of them. "I thought it would be much nicer to stay than at some hotel." Rain replied, answering his silent question. Mark gave a nod and leaned his head back as if he were going to fall asleep again. Rain nudged him again. "Let's get you to bed before you fall asleep and I can't wake up again. Lord knows I'm not carrying your ass up to the second floor."
Mark smirked in response, undid his seat belt, and climbed out of the truck. He tried to grab the bags but Rain stopped him. "I'll get those later, now come on." Rain draped his arm around her shoulder and led him into the building to their room. Rain turned on the light and closed the door behind her, giving the room a once over before helping Mark to the bed. It was a nice room, not bad for the price she paid and a pretty decent size on top of that. The large picture window immediately caught her attention and she made a note to herself to open it before going to bed.
Mark stretched himself out over the king sized bed and closed his eyes. "I'll be back in a sec, Mark." Rain said over her shoulder as she walked out the door. She heard an almost inaudible 'sure' from Mark as the door closed. Minutes later, Rain dropped Mark's bag on top of the dresser and carried her own into the bathroom. She came back out and walked over to Mark, waking him up and getting him to sit up for her.
"Why do you keep waking me up?" Mark complained as she knelt down in front of him.
"This is the last time, I promise." Rain answered as she took off his shoes and socks. Reaching to pull back the sheets, Rain tugged his shirt off and finally let him lay back down. Mark was already asleep by the time she had the sheets up to his neck...and snoring of course. Turning off the light, Rain walked into the bathroom, quietly closed the door, and pulled out her pajamas that consisted of a black T-shirt and flannel bottoms. Rain didn't take that much time changing clothes, splashing water on her face, and brushing her teeth before she walked back into the room. She made a b-line to the window and sat down on the egde after opening the window to look at the moon which was big and bright that night. Rain brought her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, resting her head on her knees and enjoying the feel of the night breeze flowing past her. She stayed there, looking out the window, for about twenty minutes when she heard Mark moving around in the bed.
Looking back to the bed, she saw that Mark had moved onto his side and his arm was extended out over the place she would normally be in their bed at home. His arm moved up and down, searching for her and then he rolled onto his back. Taking that as a cue, Rain slipped underneath the covers with Mark, draping her arm around Mark's waist and laying her head down on his chest. The second her head hit his chest his arms went around her. Some time later, Rain fell asleep, thinking of the things she and Mark would be doing the next day.